Ten dollars won't lift the needle on my fuel gauge even past the yellow. I've demonstrated this to myself repetitiously, always somehow hoping for different results. But springtime is near, and daylight is increasing, so I plan to be commuting by bicycle again soon. I know it's good for my body and for the environment and such, but economic necessity is still the best motivator. In fact, almost none of my high-minded ideals have ever made me as conscientious as has my poverty, if I may call it such. As much as I would like to be pious, and I have been, about using cloth diapers, not having cable television, not buying fast-food, or commuting via bicycle, what I regard as a shortage of funds has often been the most significant governing factor over my lifestyle. The question that arises is, "Do I really believe my life is richer just the way it is?" Only time, and increased economic viability, will tell. Someday I'll graduate from college, and the time may come when I have more money at my disposal. Whether or not I am disciplined enough to then maintain my current lifestyle will reveal if I have truly learned contentment. And I expect that I have. There is nothing I desire more than the presence and wisdom of God, and to see His name glorified. Late-model transportation and full-coverage insurance does not even compare. The only reason I think I would use my Spanish degree to land a nine-to-five, rather than go to the mission field, is that I "may have something to share with those in need" (Eph 4:28b). There is no shortage of ministries that I would like to lend more support, and no shortage of people who need help.
Then again, there is no shortage of stuff I want. Drum kit, skimboard, new van, backpacking gear, karate classes...all for the sake of the kingdom of course. "The heart is deceitful above all things," (Jer 17:9). How many times did I imagine just last month how pleasant it would be to be able to sit down in a restaurant and fill my belly? If I am only reluctantly faithful with little, how can I expect to be faithful with much? So it could be a concern that my financial limitations govern me, discipline me, more than the Spirit of God. But in actuality, the Spirit of God is not at all limited to asserting Himself only through a guilty conscience. He has all things at His disposal. "But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it" (1 Cor 10:12). His deliverance may appear in the form of an empty wallet, and we should praise Him and give Him the credit all the same. It is always God who delivers the Christian, Father who disciplines His child, and I invite Him to use whatever means necessary, that is, should I ever begin to forget to discipline myself.
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4 comments:
God does use all thing to teach us and I am very grateful for that! He is working into me that the things that are really important are for the kingdom. And once you get even a small grasp on that, everything around you changes. "Yeah, this sweater is cool, but i could send this money instead to..." Alyce once told me that once God REALLY teaches you something, you know it from then on. As for you, Gregory, you are one of the most content people I have ever met and it's one of the things I've always loved, if not always understood, about you.
I loved this post.
I think you both are rich and blessed beyond measure.
I always get so happy when I see that you and Meredith have posted something new.
I appreciate you allowing me to hear what God is doing in your life.
What a joy you both are to Mackey and I.
Agape
Alyce
Great post. I pray that heart for myself and pray that you can be an ambassador for Christ and against the spirit of Mammon in the US culture. It is very powerful there. When you go somewhere where materialism is not so rampant you will be surprised how much easier it is to be frugal. But when we are home it is hard. It is a spiritual battle - remember that.
I really appreciate all of you.
God bless you.
Gregory
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